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The latest in a long series of pointless USB devices, we bring you the USB Pole Dancer. At least this one does something, even if it’s not really exciting (excuse the pun).

Unlike the Exercise Dog or the Owl, which just move when plugged in, the pole dancer moves according to your typing speed. The faster you type, the faster she twirls. There’s even a bunch of LEDs embedded in the floor for real club effects…

I am still baffled as to why people buy these things, but this particular gadget at least makes a funny present for a man. And, compared to other USB powered dancing girls, the design on this one is better; at least they didn’t try to make her look real.

How much under $29.99?
A little: ~$29.25 on Otherlandtoys.co.uk.

Via SlipperyBrick

Snow globes are so peaceful… snow “floating” around in an idyllic scenery… and a plastic bag?!

In the case of this Ironic Snow Globe, yes. At first sight it looks like the perfect tourist souvenir: “I (heart) New York” and gently falling snow… until you notice the gently falling brown bag also included. True to life, eh?

Some New Yorkers are going to get pissed off about this, but I think most of them will see the truth. And it’s not only about New York, anyway: many big city inhabitants will recognize the scene. And maybe a few people will do more than smile or get mad; maybe they will try to change something so that in a couple of years images like this become incomprehensible. (I like dreaming, yes.)

How much under $29.99?
A little: $29 on NewYorkFirst.com.

I will never understand why people get the urge to make their pets or kids look silly. It’s a cat, it doesn’t wear dresses or “funny” hats. And babies should more of less wear tiny versions of adult clothes.

Would you go out with a Lil’ Kim wig unless you were Lil’ Kim? Thought so. So why do it to the poor kid? At least if you did it your friends could appreciate you humor (hm), but your baby is too young to have friends…

Baby Toupees are silly at best and idiotic at worst. Either way, “funny” is not a word I would use to describe them. If you feel like playing dress-up, get a doll!

How much under $29.99?
A little: $24.95 on Amazon.com.

Via Geekologie

Gregory is an iPhone eating frog. Fortunately, he won’t swallow your prized cell phone: he will just keep it safe, along with the headphones.

The Gregory iPhone cozy is as cute as it gets and is handmade from wool felt with a plushy microfiber lining. It also fits iPods, so don’t fret if you like it but haven’t given in to the iPhone craze yet.

I don’t like covering my phones or mp3 players up, so it would take something special to make me get a case… Gregory just might be it.

How much under $29.99?
A little: $25 on FredFlare.com.

Via Pocket Lint

Although the website is in French, you don’t need a translation to figure out what the Clumsy Coasters are. They’re obviously made to look like spilled water… exactly the thing you’re trying to protect your furniture against by using them.

I never used to pay much attention to my tables and cabinets. That is, until I actually bought my own furniture and starting seeing every spill as a way of losing my money’s worth. I started using coasters then and, while you can get perfectly functional ones for free or at least very cheap, innovative coasters (or dessous-de-verre - literally “under the glass”, as the French call them) can make a very nice touch for guests.

Each set comes with two coasters, making them a bit too expensive for what they do, but sometimes the design is worth it.

How much under $29.99?
A little: ~$21 on Atypyk-E-Shop.com.

Via bookofjoe

Many people think a rainbow is a good omen and, even leaving superstition aside, it’s an impressive phenomenon. If you want to have your own rainbow - albeit less impressive - you can try the electronic version, no rain required.

The Rainbow In My Room is a gadget that can brigthen up your day - if you forget the fact that it’s just a bunch of circuits and LEDs. At the wave of a hand, it shines a rainbow on your walls and ceiling. Just like magic! Or at least that’s how it will seem to a child. A perfect way of calming a nervous kid down and probably the setting for a thousand future princess stories.

Imaginative people will surely find more uses for it, such as party light or night light for a child.

How much under $29.99?
A little: $23.37 on Amazon.com.

I must’ve been living in a cave*, because Pin Art doesn’t ring any bells to me. For those in the same boat, a short explanation: it’s a case with thousands of blunt pins, that can be used to make 3D impressions of things pressed into them.

How would your face look like if it was made from pins? Will the guy in the next office get the point if you make an impression of your middle finger? What’s the most interesting office supply can you get a 3D image of? You can answer these questions or more in those idle moments and lunch breaks, and enjoy the nostalgia while you’re at it.

* A cave called “foreign country” with different fads than the US or UK, of course.

How much under $29.99?
A little: ~$25 on IWantOneofThose.com.

Claw games were fascinating because you never won, but you always knew someone who had a friend who got the coolest teddy bear just the other day. So you’d keep begging your parents for coins and keep losing…

The childhood days are over… and the frustration can be over, too. The Candy Grabber is the miniature version of a claw machine, and this time you control it. First you fill it up with the candy or toys of your choice, then get grabbing! You’re probably be just as unsuccesful, but this time you don’t have to pay and, if push comes to shove, you can just disassemble the machine to get your prize. You win in the end, either way.

How much under $29.99?
Exactly $29.99 on PerpetualKid.com.

There’s got to be an audience somewhere for USB gadgets that don’t do anything useful. Overpriced memory sticks - ok, you get an interesting design and storage. But USB powered toys that just… move from time to time? Why? I’d appreciate if someone could give me a reason, because right now I’m thinking they’re aimed at very very bored people.

The USB Chameleon is a lizard that wants to keep you company while you click away on your computer. It comes in three colors (although unfortunately it doesn’t adapt them to the environment) and from time to time it moves its eyes and tongue, but that’s about all the fun you can get out of it. Unless you try to coat the tongue with glue and see if it can catch flies…

The one good great thing about it is that it doesn’t try to hump your computer, like another pointless USB gizmo did. The worst thing about it is that it costs almost $30. Come on!

How much under $29.99?
Exactly $29.99 on AudioCubes.com.

If you’ve got a big (or small, even) yard, in 99% of the cases it will look better at night with some creative lighting. The atmosphere at a barbecue or romantic open-air dinner can be drastically changed with some well-placed lights, and something like the Solar Deck Light has one big advantage: no wires to trip on. Small kids, old people or just someone plain clumsy can have a hard time with your beautiful cables if they’re strung around all over the place…

And you’re saving the environment at the same time, you know? Each disc has 4 LED lights and a solar panel on top, so they get charged at day and then stay lit up at night for up for 5 hours. What’s not clear is what you do if you need more than 5 hours of light…

How much under $29.99?
A little: $24.95 each on Gardeners.com.

Via DVICE