Well you’re in luck, because the Slang Umbrella can help you accomplish this and stay dry. Seen from a distance, it’s just a normal umbrella. Large (3 ft. diameter) and with a classy black&white pattern. Get closer… you’ll be able to see that the pattern is actually made up out of words. Dirty words, to be exact (“slang” is an understatement).
Shocked gasps, guaranteed. Conversations about the state of the world, ditto. No drop of rain on you, of course. If this sounds like a good deal, go right ahead.
How much under $29.99?
Some: $18.99 on ShopHappyTrails.com.