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The latest in a long series of pointless USB devices, we bring you the USB Pole Dancer. At least this one does something, even if it’s not really exciting (excuse the pun).

Unlike the Exercise Dog or the Owl, which just move when plugged in, the pole dancer moves according to your typing speed. The faster you type, the faster she twirls. There’s even a bunch of LEDs embedded in the floor for real club effects…

I am still baffled as to why people buy these things, but this particular gadget at least makes a funny present for a man. And, compared to other USB powered dancing girls, the design on this one is better; at least they didn’t try to make her look real.

How much under $29.99?
A little: ~$29.25 on Otherlandtoys.co.uk.

Via SlipperyBrick

Go into any computer store and you’ll find a dozen flash drives, so why feature this particular one?

Well… it’s pretty. Really, you can’t do much about storage, you only get a couple of options, but the design can set a flash drive apart from the rest. And the SanDisk Cruzer Pattern USB Flash Drive really is special. Well, at least if you’re a girl or have a thing for flower patterns. I’m both, so I’m drooling over it.

It’s even got a clip! Not that I would consider clipping it to my pocket or strap to show it off (that spells “lost drive”), but it would be very cool if I could attach it to an inside pocket to avoid rummaging for it all the time.

The 2GB storage capacity isn’t that impressive unfortunately, so only buy this if you’re interesting in transfering smaller files. That DVD you just copied? Won’t work, sorry.

How much under $29.99?
Some: $12.71 on Amazon.com.

Via Chip Chick

It’s not good for people to have bored colleagues. They can’t go walking around the office, so they sit at the computer tapping their feet or playing with pens or other equally annoying repetitive actions.

The USB Soccer Fidget says it can stop that behavior, and if it works I’m buying a whole stash for future use. The soccer ball activates a desktop mini-game with three game modes; the trick is that you have to keep pressing the ball to control the shooting speed, which is supposed to allow you to let out frustration in a fun way.

I don’t really think it will stop anyone from making annoying noises, because most feet tappers do it all the time, not only when bored. But the frustration part might work; a mindless game from once in a while can do wonders, I tell you.

How much under $29.99?
Some: $15 on USBGeek.com.

Via RedFerret

There’s got to be an audience somewhere for USB gadgets that don’t do anything useful. Overpriced memory sticks - ok, you get an interesting design and storage. But USB powered toys that just… move from time to time? Why? I’d appreciate if someone could give me a reason, because right now I’m thinking they’re aimed at very very bored people.

The USB Chameleon is a lizard that wants to keep you company while you click away on your computer. It comes in three colors (although unfortunately it doesn’t adapt them to the environment) and from time to time it moves its eyes and tongue, but that’s about all the fun you can get out of it. Unless you try to coat the tongue with glue and see if it can catch flies…

The one good great thing about it is that it doesn’t try to hump your computer, like another pointless USB gizmo did. The worst thing about it is that it costs almost $30. Come on!

How much under $29.99?
Exactly $29.99 on AudioCubes.com.

Countless times I’ve been in a car with a dead phone/mp3 player and no way to charge it. And countless times I’ve promised myself I’d get a car charger. But there was one problem: I don’t have car charger extensions for either…

Then again, at least my mp3 player has an USB connection, which is a big incentive for me getting a Multi-Use Car Charger with Dual USB Ports. Beside other obvious uses, this says “ability to listen to music in the car without worrying about charging issues”. With this and a 60GB iPod, the music for a long road trip is assured, which is a must for me.

How much under $29.99?
Some: $15.95 on Amazon.com.

Via OhGizmo!

I’ll start by stating the obvious: the USB Golf Mouse Set is ugly. It’s got a mouse shaped like a golf ball - only a bit flatter -, a green mouse pad, a flag, a small golf ball and a club.

If you’re very, excruciatingly, extremely bored at work it could offer a couple of minutes of entertainment… Or maybe more if you’re a golf fan. But the shape of the pad and the flag poking out of it probably make it pretty difficult to use, and the shape of the mouse isn’t ergonomic.

However, the mouse is the only worthwhile piece of the set, it looks kind of cool and I guess it could work as a gift for a golfer. But only if you’re a cheapskate.

How much under $29.99?
Some: $18 on Gadget4All.com.

Via ChipChick

At this rate, in a couple of months I’ll be powering everything through my USB ports… and I’ll need to buy one of those hubs, finally.

The latest USB powered item I’ve seen is the Versatile USB Battery Turbo Charger. A battery charger is an absolute must to me, without it I’d have a dead camera, and traveling without a means of taking photo is a big no-no. This USB charger from A4Tech can charge both AA and AAA batteries, so it’s the perfect thing to take along for your camera, mouse, even mp3 player. I hate buying normal batteries that only last for a couple of days, so I am a big fan of rechargeables.

How much under $29.99?
Some: $14.88 on DitCorp.com.

Via TechieDiva

Do you feel your computer is a little boring? You could add some stickers or get a new case or mod your old one… but shiny lights are easier to get.

Called USB Office Fairy Lights for some reason (do fairies usually fly around computers?), they’re basically stars on a string that can go around your monitor, case or even serve as home decoration (hopefully only for Christmas).

They’re not useful, and I don’t think they really make your desk any better. But if you’ve got a teen niece and you’re out of ideas…

How much under $29.99?
Some: $12.99 on Amazon.com.

Via Coolest Gadgets

I’m tired of all these USB hub something-or-others that keep popping up, but sometimes, among all the crap, there’s something that makes me think “Ohh, I could really use that!”.

Case in point: USB 4-Port Hub With Notebook Light. A notebook light is very important for me, since I tend to work at night and I find normal lamps annoying (light in my eyes, not on the keys, ugh), and this particular light is placed just great on the laptop lid. And I figure, as long as you have free space, why not stick some USB ports on it? Might come in useful sooner than you think.

How much under $29.99?
Exactly $29.90 on Gadget4All.com.

Via Coolest Gadgets

USB drives are undeniably useful… but why on Earth would someone buy a 256MB one?

The Robot USB Drive looks very good. It really does look like a robot, it’s metallic and shiny, can be attached to your keys… but it’s incredibly small and very expensive. All right, it’s made to be given away as a corporate gift, but still. I don’t think it’s worth it in the end, unless you have a big budget you have to spend.

It does get cheaper as you go… if you order over 2500 items you can get each for $16.85. You just need a lot of business partners. Or a huge conference.

How much under $29.99?
A little: $28.50 on E-CorporateGifts.com.

Via BoingBoing